Respect for the Aged Day and Morning Glories

The third Monday of September is Respect for the Aged Day, 

a nationwide celebration to the elderly for their countless contributions 

 to family, society, and country.    

Both parents and parents-in-law of mine are not in this world 

but I have an uncle in his late 80s.  

The photo below is the lobby of the building he lives with his wife.  

Established in the bubble economy time (late 1980s), the assisted-living condo 

looks like a gorgeous resort hotel. 

The slow-moving residents live independently and are taken care when in need. 

Because of the aftereffect of stroke in this spring, my uncle is taken care in the nursery section.

I haven't seen him for a while due to the corona crisis.

Ageing is not deterioration but natural progression. 

"You’re only as old as you feel."   

 I'd like to enjoy my age to liberate oneself and to discover what really brings joy and serenity.  

I also would like to be green and perky like the plant above, but not in a pot,

keeping it in mind that the beauty of life is made up of light and shadow.

 

Morning glory, "Asa-gawo" meaning "morning face" in Japanese, blooms at sunrise and wilts around noon.

One day flower can be enjoyed only TODAY.

They perform best in the full sunlight.

Morning glories in the pots have flowered one after another every morning in my garden

from July and will keep flowering for a while.

The ones as the green curtains to shield from sunlight on the west side of my house, 

however, were in the miserable condition when the rainy season ended.

But soon they regained strength and thrived.

They are flowering one by one still now.

Left; outside the window

Right; the green curtain seen through “sudare” blind right outside the window,

both to shield openings of the house from sunlight. 

The big event of F and Y during their too short summer holiday was 

ballet recital with audience of only families. 

The boy Y living nearby could enjoy a little longer break full of colorful events with M.

The school graders went back to school life in the 38C life-threatening heat of August, 

and of the record hottest September.

The bullet photos are from the last year.

Annual poster contest to raise public awareness about well-being of deer.

Y wrote "Watch over tenderly!"

Suddenly air turned to be fresh and crisp last week after the long, long sizzling days.

Time for me to resume travelling and blogging.

Linked to Mosaic Monday

This and that recently

In spite of the saying "Neither heat nor cold lasts beyond the equinox.",
weather has been weird and unstable with windy cold air in the strong sunlight.
 Colors of water, however, have changed for sure.

What do you see in the photo above?

Water lily pads, reflected bare cherry trees, of which blossoms will start blooming in a week,

blue skies, and soft yellow Sanshuu, or Cornus officinalis Sieb. et Zucc.

I heard from my daughter H who had a trip to Miyama-cho, northern part of Kyoto.
Miyama-cho is famous for more than 200 traditional, thatched roof farmhouses
where people still live and work.
(My post of the year 2011 about the hamlet, here.)

H's lodging was one of the old traditional houses.

Her family experienced simple and slow life.

i-Phone photo taken by my son-in-law

H's family monopolized three rooms (totally 50-jyo, or 100 tatami-mats),
a kitchen, and a bathroom.

The old but not dirty, uncluttered house has been well cared for throughout the years.

The dinner was “hot pot dish” of vegetables picked in the neighboring fields and chickens.

Photos sent to me by my daughter

These two dolls made of Japanese papers or straws were created
by my husband's late grandmother.
They became in bad condition after about 40 years.

As they get older, they've come to radiate more and more mysterious aura.

Meticulously-made bouquet

This plant has an attractive soft shine before crumbling away soon.

One day, I tidied the storeroom.
On finding some of the paintings by my son S in his lower grades,
memories came back instantly
though I had been completely forgetting about the paintings.

At the age of 8

In a few years, S's eldest daughter will become the age 

when he painted these paintings.

From seven to nine

About three-week spring break before new academic school year 

is time to be spent with grandchildren.

It's time to be realized their personal growth.

It's an eventful period including graduation of kindergarten and a concert in March,
entrance to elementary school or kindergarten and ballet performance in April.

I am not a minimalist but in some years I’d like to pare down my possessions

until only things that are necessary for their utility or beauty alone are left.

A container made of milk carton and Japanese papers by H

After enough interaction with grandchildren 

or works of cleaning and tidying up,

there's nothing more like a relaxing coffee time with a cake.

My next post will be Sakura (cherry blossoms) in mid-April.

Keep tuned!

Flowers gone with the season change

For a long time I neglected the works of gardening but the lovely flowers, seemingly untamed but actually taken care by my husband, surely comforted me while I cared for and watched over my mother in turn with my siblings at her home in Kobe.  These are some of the flowers which made me pleased and smile since the start of my mother's hospice care at home in February.  (Hospice at home)   The doctor specializes in palliative cares and psychosomatic medicine.

Pansies and Violas were vibrant when my entire garden was dormant in winter and lasted till the end of May.

Christmas Roses look discreet always facing downward. 

They reminded me of my mother suffering and enduring in silence.

Japanese white eyes and Brown-eared bulbuls like this Camellia.

I was relaxed watching them coming and going.

 

Another Camellia with big face could be seen from where I tapped the keyboard of my laptop.

At around the time when Rhododendrons bloomed, spring was fully sprung in my garden.

The medicine to treat her anxiety for breathlessness, with which she was caught a few times with horror, seems to have made her unable to speak smoothly.

Her whole body was apparently weakening constantly but mind was rather sharp.

When dogwood was going to end, season was changing into early summer.

Delirium occurred more often to her and wakefulness made her suffer at night.  In the daytime, she looked relatively comfortable while her pain and anxiety was treated by medical morphine. Delirium, "senmo" in Japanese, is culturally thought to be the coming of the deceased loved ones to take her to paradise.



On a rainy day, something magical was happening when I stepped into the garden.

My favorite Bluebell

Strawberry plant bore fruits soon after blooming.

Until six days before her death, she sat on the chair and ate, though what she could eat was only jelly-like things because not only small pieces of solid food but also liquid choked her.  She liked to taste sip by sip the broken and stirred strawberries harvested in my garden. 





 This Hanaguruma azalea, or Rhododendron macrosepalum cv. Hanaguruma, 

was presented by my mother

when I had a house on this land thirty years ago.

Five days before her death, her wakefulness at night ended and she slept the whole night through till she was awaken late in the morning to find heart pains.  Rapidly she went downturn: only a small piece of ice was placed on her tongue to wet her throat but soon she got unable to swallow up even the melted ice.  Families gathered to see her one last time and we children cycled in and out of the room for the next four days, showing our thankfulness and goodbyes in our own different ways.  She kept on sleeping while her pain was under control by suppository of medical morphine, and then ..... she breathed her last quietly after being in a deep sleep for two days on June 5.  The rainy season set in the previous day.

Wake and funeral were held at home as she had wished, attended by about 40 people including only the family of children, grandchildren, great-grand children and the very small number of people who had been closest to her.  The alter was made with her favorite-colored flowers, pink, red, and lavender, based around the color white.

 Thank you for your unconditional love, encouraging sweet smiles,
and guiding me by your attitude throughout your life.

May your soul rest in peace, Mom.

Hospice at home

 

January

I bought a small pot of primrose late last year to put on the table on the sunroof deck.  They have grown and bloomed little by little in the shivering cold. 

March

 

By the way, how would you like to live your days at the very final stage of life?  My siblings and I have wanted to let our frail mother live her final days, as she has wished, at peace and with dignity without depending too much on medical examinations and treatments , and finally we could meet a doctor and her medical staff to make our dream come true.

 

Five petals are like open palm welcoming you.

 

Home hospice recipients are not limited to sufferers of terminal cancer and HIV like hospice-care at the hospitals.  Our doctor runs a clinic and offers home-hospice: the team centered around the female doctor is on call 24 hours a day, aside from regular, scheduled home visits. They offer health check, medical care including palliative care, aromatherapy, spiritual counselling and so on, depending on the patient's condition.  

Sparkling laughter in the sunshine

My mother was tense before meeting them, but by their tender and affectionate words and smiles and confident professional touch, she seems to have felt reassured.  Not only my mother but also we children felt relieved to the dependable and reliable supporters. How fortunate we are!  I think the number of the elderly who prefer to be cared for in their own homes with all that is familiar about them and have the same fortune with my mother would be very small.  

 

On her 93rd birthday, November, 2013.
My sister-in-law dyed her hair.
She suddenly went downward after that.

 

Elder-care at home or nursing home, it would vary from home to home.  In this super aged-country, elder people are taking care of more elderly people, and at home the main care givers are daughters or daughters-in-law. As to the male member of my family, my brother, he has taken leadership. At night, he sleeps in her room, which would work as a mental palliative care as fear intensifies at night if the patient is alone. I smile to imagine their talks before going to sleep, no matter how trivial. 

Of course it's not easy to care for the old ailing mother with only family members as things happen one after another as if tested not only to mother but also to us children and our family.  We would depend on home helpers through Japan's Long-term Care Insurance System.

Buds,  bundle of energy

A child of Wind, another bundle of energy, will enter 3-year-old class of the kindergarten in April.

 

Wonder of living is so moving.  I've been learning about something important about the meaning of life from both the frail and weakening mother and the constantly growing little grandchildren.  

Primrose is one of my mother's favorites, and mine, too.  To me, it looks like a family consisting of babies, youths, the middle-aged, the elderly, and the withering ones, who enjoy sunshine and bare the chilly wind together.

Thank you for stopping by and taking the time to read, dear Friends.
I'll catch up visiting your blog, though very slowly under the circumstances.

 

On Respect for the Aged Day



The sky is spacious at the ruins of ancient capital, Fujiwara-kyo (694-710).

The third Monday of September is 敬老の日, Respect for the Aged Day, in Japan.  It is the day to respect the elderly and celebrate long life.  It was originally September 15 called as 老人の日, Old Folks’ Day, and it was changed to the third Monday of September according to the Happy Monday System in which some national holidays were moved to Mondays to create a three-day weekend.



water hyacinth in the fallow field nearby

To some people, Respect for the Aged Day would be just another ordinary holiday.  Some people would think they don’t need such a special setting because of their constant respect and care to the elderly around them.  What is special about this day is that many events are held by local governments to entertain the aged or distribute presents.  Some children visit parents or grandparents on that day if they are not living together. Elderly people deserve respect from family and the community for what they have contributed.   Sadly this ideal is not always fulfilled (though mostly so) and I sometimes hear terrible story of dying alone unnoticed.



lotuses in the corner of the site of Fujiwara-kyo ruins late in August

Japan is an aged society and will become super aged with one third of Japanese population as 65-year-old or more by 2035 if the current low birthrate continues.

(Click on the photo to enlarge.)

An insect is embraced by the lotus flower where Buddha is  to be seated.

When I say “elderly people”, I don’t mean particular age group, though over 80 must be the elderly indeed.  I think people in their sixties would be one of the most vibrant generations in my country.  In spite of having been corporate worriers with less vacation, they really know how to live positively, and enjoy free time after retirement without carrying the main responsibility.  Many of them are very actively involved in various activities including their hobbies, volunteer works utilizing their knowledge and expertise, or totally new things.  Women are much more so.

 

How old is not measured by the age number or appearance but perception and attitude toward ageing.  In fact, diet habit and attitude make a big difference in aging process.





When I saw lotus flowers at the site of Fujiwara-kyo ruins toward the end of August, many of the lotus flowers are gone with  lotus seed heads left.  They reminded me of the life which was handed on from generation to generation.   Some seeds leave offspring, while some are used for food or for medicinal purposes.  

photo taken at a large colony of lots at Lake Biwa

I like Lotus flower like many other Japanese people for its spiritual overtone needless to say for its loveliness.  A lotus grows in muddy water, rises above the surface to bloom beautifully and radiantly unsullied.  

We all have a seed in our mind.   To live is to make it flower gracefully and courageously and transfer its seed, which contains not only life but also spiritual patrimony of traditions, concepts, and wisdom, to the next generation.

Turtles hold the symbolic meaning for steadfastness and  longevity.

- Visit Our World Tuesday to see more about our world.-